“Qué Great book could be written with what is known. Another much older would be written with what is not known! ” Julio Verne
The self-knowledge It is very important for our personal development. Sometimes we are more knowledgeable about what other people crave or look for than what we feel.
We know very personal information about celebrities to which we have not had the pleasure of knowing and we are full of data on matters and events that do not have a direct impact on our day to day. But when we talk about ourselves, we may not know exactly what to express. Some of our daily emotional or psychological problems may have to do with a lack of awareness about who we are: what are our desires, our greatest virtues and defects, what we want and what we don't want. There is a powerful weapon that has demonstrated through multiple studies the positive effect it has when it comes to achieving our self-knowledge and emotional stability: writing, which we talk about next.
- 1 What benefits can self-knowledge bring?
- 2 How can we begin to know each other better by writing?
- 3 How to start writing?
- 4 Tips to reach self-knowledge through writing
What benefits can self-knowledge bring?
It's hard to be happy if we can't express who we are. Without having the certainty of knowing ourselves well, we can fall into negative behaviors that try to fill that void. We can be who others want us to be, behave like others believe that we should behave and even spend our money on items or practices that get us to like others more, creating a fictional "person" who manages to prevent us from facing the fact of not recognizing ourselves to ourselves. The freedom that gives us self-knowledge it achieves that we overcome emotional conflicts, that we feel in greater control with the contextual situations and that we resist social pressure. It makes us more tolerant and empathic people with others and with ourselves, as well as improving our ability to decide and move forward: “I can teach anyone how to get what they want in life. The problem is that I can't find who can tell me what he wants" - Mark Twain.
How can we begin to know each other better by writing?
Self-knowledge is a process that requires time and effort.. It is through the passage of time and the blows that we suffer when we end up knowing our strengths and weaknesses in a continuous process of maturation. However, there are some techniques, such as writing, that we can use to develop our capacity for self-knowledge a little more.
Writing every day has very positive emotional effects. Hundreds of studies have documented over the past decades the psychological benefits that writing has on our emotional well-being. Just a few minutes a day expressing ourselves in words, he manages to make us recognize motivations and emotions that we are sometimes not fully aware of until we verbalize them. Writing also helps to cope states of stress and anxiety, feelings that we cannot face, as well as helping us overcome complicated situations. That is why this act is often used as a technique in different psychological therapies, such as cognitive behavioral therapy.
Writing we manage to organize ideas and give a narrative sense to our reality. A reality that sometimes may seem chaotic to us. The cognitive effort involved in carrying out This process helps us manage emotions, which makes us feel more satisfied and rested.
How to start writing?
It is not necessary that from the beginning we write something too deep, we can simply take a few minutes to explain what happened to us on the day, how we felt or what thoughts we had about it.
When we read the texts we have written from time to time, we can identify patterns that we repeat over and over again. It is a good way to identify those behaviors and beliefs that keep us plunged into a reality that does not fit what we expect. We will also find words that speak about ourselves and that we were not fully aware of before. Has it happened to you that when you read the thoughts and experiences of other people you get to understand them in a deeper and more obvious way? This also happens when we read ourselves from an external perspective.
Tips to reach self-knowledge through writing
According to Sandy Grason, author of the book "The newspaper to wake up your inner voice, heal your life and manifest your dreams", some tricks to write a newspaper focused on self-knowledge are:
- "I don't want to talk about ..." According to the writer, it is about establishing a maximum time of ten minutes, in which you must write the first thing that comes to your thoughts. The importance of this exercise is to be honest and vulnerable, as well as write about something that is very difficult for us to express. In Grason's words: “Sometimes we tend to go around our real problems. We want to write perfect and beautiful diaries, when our real life is not as such. Allowing us to talk about what we never want to talk about takes us directly to those things we need to work from a blank page. ”
- "Who am I now?" Again, in a maximum of ten minutes, we must answer this question, based on the idea of who we were before, at 8, 16 or 25 years old and who we are now. It is about describing the differences between who we were and who we are now, as well as the facts, in general, that have led us here.
- "Things I love". It's about setting up an open list about what makes us feel good and be happy. This list fits from very important events such as “buying a new house” or “getting promoted” to small everyday events that seem unimportant but that cause us great satisfaction, such as the sensation of feeling the hot water in the shower or the Smell of a perfume that we like.
- “Conversations with your 99-year-old self”. It's about imagining ourselves with 99 years, good health and great wisdom. Imagine what advice you would give to your current self, what things have been truly important for that 99-year-old person and what do you think he would tell you about what you should focus more and less on for the rest of your life.
Links of interest
How to Deal With Anxiety, Tragedy or Heartache - 4 Steps From Research. Eric Barker 2014. //time.com/3590308/deal-with-anxiety-tragedy-heartache/
5 Ways to Get to Know Yourself Better. Margarita Tartakovsky ,. //psychcentral.com/blog/5-ways-to-get-to-know-yourself-better/
How To Understand Yourself Better: Write Down Your Thoughts. //www.finerminds.com/personal-growth/understand-yourself-better